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Thursday, October 31st, 2013

Oct 31, 2013 -- 11:53am

TODAY'S GENIUS AWARD GOES TO . . . . . . .
    Yang Hu, 26, who severed his manhood from his body, then decided to bicycle to the hospital to have it re-attached. But he forgot one very important thing... to bring the severed part with him. Hu was apparently depressed at his non-existent love life, so he cut off his own penis. He must have had second thoughts, because he rushed to the hospital to have it reattached. However in his confusion he forgot to take it with him to hospital when he sought treatment. Hu eventually rode home to retrieve his penis, but doctors hit him with more bad news - it had been without blood for too long and was therefore impossible to re-attach.

AND THEN THERE'S .....
    Lamenda Kingdon, 62, whose plans to visit Granada, Spain were delayed after she mistakenly took a flight to Grenada in the Caribbean. Kingdon, who is suffering from cancer, used her accumulated British Airways air miles to visit Granada, Spain, but did not discover the mix-up until she was speaking to a fellow traveler on her plane. She wasn't going to Granada, she was going to Grenada. Kingdon got off the plane during a refueling stop in the Caribbean and was flown back to London by British Airways, which picked up the tab for another flight to Granada and refunded the air miles she used to purchase the first ticket. She said, "I noticed on the ticket that it said "Grenada airport," but didn't think too much about it, because I know sometimes in other countries they spell their place names differently to how we do in English."

OR HOW 'BOUT .....
    Jesuraja Mookiah, 41, who wasn't pleased that another drive-thru customer allowed a car to cut in line, so he started waving a his handgun and swearing. Police say Mookiah was waiting for his order in his car behind a family, who showed courtesy to another patron. Mookiah began honking his horn, then held up a silver handgun while yelling at the family, "I'm gonna ---- you up!" The family called 911. When police pulled Mookiah over, they found a magazine for a .38 caliber semiautomatic handgun loaded with six live rounds of ammunition. They also found a semiautomatic, silver, .38 Bersa handgun. This McDonald's customer, who wasn't "Lovin' It," has been charged with aggravated assault.

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